Living in Japan as a foreigner can feel like walking a tightrope between adapting to the culture and staying true to yourself. The pressure to conform—whether at work, in social settings, or even in how we express ourselves—can sometimes be overwhelming. Many foreigners find themselves asking: Do I need to become “more Japanese” to succeed here? But as Adam Grant argues in his book Originals: How Non-Conformists Move the World, true success doesn’t come from blindly following the rules—it comes from challenging norms strategically. This idea resonates deeply with my experience as a foreigner in Japan. You don’t have to erase your identity to fit in; instead, you can find a way to blend in while still standing out in the best possible way.
You Don’t Have to Completely Conform to Be Accepted
One of the biggest struggles foreigners face in Japan is the expectation to conform. From strict workplace hierarchies to unspoken social rules, there’s an underlying pressure to “fit in” to be accepted. But Grant’s research shows that the most successful people aren’t those who conform completely—they’re the ones who understand the rules but also know when and how to challenge them. In Japan, this means finding a balance between respecting the culture and maintaining your individuality.
I once met a foreign mother who felt pressured to adopt every aspect of Japanese parenting just to be accepted. From strict meal prep guidelines at daycare to specific ways of dressing her child, she initially felt she had to follow everything to the letter. But over time, she realized she could respect these customs while still incorporating her own parenting style. Instead of forcing herself to cook entirely Japanese-style bentos, she started adding elements from her own culture, making lunches that were both acceptable at daycare and true to her background. The result? Other moms became curious about her approach, and instead of feeling like an outsider, she found herself forming connections through her differences.
Strategic Risk-Taking: The Art of Blending In Without Losing Yourself
In Originals, Grant debunks the myth that innovators are reckless risk-takers. In reality, they take calculated risks. This is an important lesson for foreigners navigating life in Japan. Instead of resisting every cultural expectation, the key is to choose which aspects to adapt to and which to gently push back against.
Take fashion, for example. Japan has a culture of uniformity in professional settings, and some foreigners feel they need to completely overhaul their wardrobe to fit in. But I’ve seen people subtly incorporate their own style—whether it’s a bold accessory or a slightly different cut of a suit—without violating any unspoken dress codes. It’s a small but effective way to maintain individuality while respecting cultural norms.
Another example is how foreigners approach community events, such as school PTA meetings or neighborhood gatherings. Many feel intimidated by the expectation to participate in group activities. Some foreigners avoid these completely, while others try too hard to fit in, leading to burnout. But those who find a middle ground—attending key events while setting boundaries—often end up forming deeper connections without feeling overwhelmed.
Procrastination Can Lead to Better Adaptation
One of the surprising insights from Originals is that procrastination isn’t always bad—it can actually lead to better ideas and solutions. When moving to Japan, many foreigners feel pressured to adapt quickly, thinking they need to immediately learn every custom, speak fluent Japanese, and fully integrate. But sometimes, taking a step back and allowing yourself time to adjust naturally can lead to a smoother transition.
When I first arrived in Japan, I wanted to fit in so badly that I forced myself to adopt habits I wasn’t comfortable with—like bowing excessively or avoiding eye contact (which is normal in my home country). But over time, I realized that I could blend in while still being myself. Instead of forcing immediate change, I allowed myself to observe, adapt slowly, and integrate in a way that felt natural. This made my transition much easier and more authentic.
You Don’t Have to Be the First—You Just Have to Give the Best Version of You
A common belief is that the first person to introduce something new will always be the most successful, but Grant’s research proves otherwise. Often, those who refine existing ideas—rather than being the first movers—achieve greater success. This concept is incredibly relevant to foreigners in Japan. Instead of trying to be the “first” at anything, focus on being excellent at what you do.
I’ve seen many foreigners build successful businesses, not because they were the first in their industry, but because they took an existing idea and improved it. A great example is a foreign friend of mine who started baking and selling cakes. At first, she worried that Japan already had countless bakeries and that she wouldn’t be able to stand out. But instead of competing directly, she focused on something unique—creating beautifully decorated, foreign-style celebration cakes that weren’t common in Japanese patisseries. Because she refined and elevated an existing idea rather than trying to introduce something completely new, her business took off.
Surround Yourself with the Right People
In Originals, Grant emphasizes the importance of surrounding yourself with people who challenge your thinking. This is crucial for foreigners in Japan. It’s easy to fall into the habit of sticking only with foreign communities, which can be comforting but also limiting. The most successful and well-adjusted foreigners I’ve met are those who build a diverse network—one that includes both Japanese friends and fellow foreigners who push them to grow.
When I first moved here, I relied heavily on foreign groups, which helped me feel at home. But it wasn’t until I started forming deeper connections with Japanese colleagues, neighbors, and even my in-laws that I truly felt integrated. These relationships gave me new perspectives, professional opportunities, and a deeper appreciation for Japan’s culture.
Conclusion: Becoming an “Original” Gaijin
Being a foreigner in Japan doesn’t mean you have to erase your identity to fit in. As Originals teaches us, the key to success isn’t blind conformity—it’s knowing when to blend in, when to stand out, and how to navigate the space in between. By taking calculated risks, giving yourself time to adapt, striving for excellence rather than being first, and surrounding yourself with the right people, you can build a fulfilling and successful life in Japan without losing who you are. Instead of asking, “How can I become more like them?”, the real question should be, “How can I bring the best version of myself into this culture?” Because true originality isn’t about being different just for the sake of it—it’s about being authentically you, no matter where you are in the world.
What About You?
How have you balanced fitting in with staying true to yourself in Japan? Have you found ways to introduce new ideas while respecting the culture? Share your experiences in the comments—I’d love to hear your thoughts!
