Before we step into this new chapter, let me begin by saying this—congratulations to your child for graduating from elementary school! Six unforgettable years of growth, friendships, school festivals, and little victories that made them who they are today. And to you, dear parents, you deserve just as much praise. For the countless early mornings preparing for them, their bentos, attending undōkai with a cheering heart, sankanbi with quiet pride, and every PTA meeting where you tried your best to understand and belong—you did it. You’ve walked beside your child with courage and love, especially as a foreigner raising a family in Japan.
As for me, nothing could have prepared me for the wave of emotions that hit me on my daughter’s graduation day.
She walked up to me, a little taller than before, dressed in her neat uniform with her eyes shimmering with quiet maturity. Then she handed me a letter—a handwritten note filled with love and gratitude. In it, she thanked us for the care, the patience, the late nights, and the everyday support that often went unnoticed. Her words were so sincere, so heart-touching… I couldn’t hold back the tears. Not just because I was proud, but because in that single moment, I realized: she saw it all. She felt it all. The invisible love I pour into their everyday lives—it reached her heart.
And now, here we are. Standing on the edge of a brand new beginning: Japanese junior high school. A world of new uniforms, new rules, new friendships, and new fears. And while our children are doing their best to step bravely into the unknown, we parents are right there with them, carrying both pride and worry in our hearts.
If you’re a foreign mom like me, maybe you’re wondering the same things I did: What’s going to change? How different is junior high from elementary school? Will my child be okay? Will I be able to support her in this new phase, language barrier and all?
In this post, I’ll walk you through our personal journey—my daughter’s first day at Japanese junior high school—and all the emotions, surprises, cultural moments, and insights that came with it. I’ll share what I’ve learned, what helped us prepare, and the little things I wish someone had told me beforehand. Because honestly? This stage is just as much a milestone for us parents as it is for our children.
So whether you’re getting ready for your child’s junior high adventure or already walking that path, I hope my story brings you comfort, clarity, and encouragement. You’re not alone. We’re learning together.
Let’s walk this journey—one step at a time.
What to Expect: Key Differences Between Elementary and Junior High School in Japan
Entering junior high school in Japan isn’t just a change of school—it’s a complete shift in rhythm, responsibility, and expectations. As a foreign parent, I was surprised by how much had changed almost overnight. If you’re preparing your child—or yourself—for this next phase, here are some of the key differences I noticed, plus a few things I wish someone had told me sooner.
1. A More Structured School Day
In elementary school, the atmosphere feels gentler. There’s more room for play, creativity, and social bonding. But once your child enters junior high, the schedule becomes much more structured—and intense.
• Longer school days: School starts around 8:00 AM and can go until 4:00 PM or later, especially if your child joins a bukatsu (club).
• More subjects, more homework: Students tackle more academic subjects with deeper content. My daughter suddenly had to juggle multiple notebooks, textbooks, and some homework assignments.
• Test culture begins: Regular testing becomes the norm, with midterms, finals, and monthly quizzes. Grades matter more now and can affect high school entrance down the road.
2. The Uniform and Appearance Rules
Ah yes, the legendary Japanese junior high uniform. It’s adorable, yes—but also comes with strict dress codes.
• Hair must be natural color (black), no makeup, no accessories.
• Socks, shoes, and even undergarments may have regulations. Some schools check these things.
• Shoes change from indoor to outdoor, and gym shoes are separate too.
My take? As a foreign mom, this was a bit overwhelming at first. I had to double-check every purchase—from socks to ponytail bands—to make sure they were school-approved. If you’re unsure, your school handbook will become your best friend.
3. Embracing Bukatsu Life
One of the most exciting—and sometimes nerve-wracking—parts of entering junior high school in Japan is the start of bukatsu (部活), or after-school club activities. It’s a big deal here, something most students look forward to, and a defining experience throughout their junior high life.
While my daughter didn’t officially join a formal club (クラブ), she did start participating in the school’s volleyball bukatsu. And let me tell you—it’s already been a whirlwind of learning, laughter, and a few sore muscles!
What Is Bukatsu, Really?
If you’re new to Japanese school culture, bukatsu can feel a bit overwhelming. But in simple terms, it’s an extension of your child’s learning and development beyond academics. Bukatsu fosters discipline, teamwork, perseverance, and a deep sense of belonging.
There are generally two types:
- Official School Clubs (部活動 or クラブ活動): These are more structured and often involve competitions, uniforms, and strict practice schedules.
- Casual Bukatsu Activities: These are more flexible, less competitive, and designed for students to enjoy learning something new, bond with classmates, and stay active.
My daughter is currently enjoying the latter. She joined the volleyball bukatsu—not because she had previous experience, but because it sparked her curiosity. And I couldn’t be prouder of her for stepping outside her comfort zone.
Supporting Your Child Through Their Bukatsu
As a parent, especially a foreign parent in Japan, it can be hard to know how to best support your child’s bukatsu journey. But here are some practical and emotional ways to be there for them:
- Encourage curiosity over perfection. Especially in the beginning, it’s okay if they’re not great at it. The most important thing is that they’re trying and enjoying themselves.
- Show up when you can. While bukatsu sessions often happen after school and aren’t usually open for parents to observe, just asking how practice went or helping with prep (like water bottles or sportswear) can mean the world.
- Help them stay balanced. Some kids can get overly committed, especially if they’re perfectionists. Remind them it’s okay to rest, and schoolwork or family time still matters.
- Learn the schedule. Bukatsu can run 3–5 days a week, depending on the school and the activity. Practices may even happen during weekends or holidays for official clubs. Knowing the schedule helps avoid surprises.
Volleyball and Building Inner Strength
Volleyball has been an unexpected blessing for my daughter. She’s learning how to work in a team, how to communicate with upperclassmen, and how to keep going even when things get tough. It’s more than just a sport—it’s character building in action.
She came home the other day, her cheeks flushed from running, and told me, “Mama, I didn’t get the ball today, but I kept trying. I’ll get it next time.” That small sentence held so much growth and self-assurance. It reminded me why bukatsu is such a cherished part of school life in Japan.
4. Communication Becomes Less Frequent
In elementary school, teachers often communicate with parents through Renrakucho (notebooks) or class messaging apps. But in junior high, the communication gap widens.
• Teachers expect more independence from students.
• PTAs still exist but might be more formal and less involved.
• Parents may not always know what’s going on unless the student shares it.
What worked for us? I simply started checking in more intentionally with my daughter—asking not just “How was school?” but things like, “Did anything surprise you today?” or “What’s the funniest thing that happened?” It helped open more meaningful conversations.
5. The Pressure Is Real, But So Is the Growth
These years are full of emotional, academic, and social challenges. There are more expectations from teachers, pressure to succeed in tests, and a heightened awareness among kids about fitting in.
• Peer pressure becomes stronger. From fashion to phone use (yes, many kids start getting phones now), there’s a constant balancing act of independence vs. school rules.
• Kids start thinking about their future. High school entrance exams are already in their minds even now.
• But they also begin to bloom. It’s beautiful to watch your child become more self-aware, responsible, and proud of their progress.
Watching my daughter navigate all of this isn’t always easy. But the day she told me, “I can do this, Mom,” I realized that we’re raising resilient, adaptable young people. And that’s something to celebrate—even on the hard days.
This transition isn’t just a big moment for our children—it’s a milestone for us as parents too. We’re learning, adjusting, and growing right alongside them. And while it’s not always smooth or simple, it is filled with powerful moments of connection, pride, and quiet triumph.
If you’re on this path too, know this: You’re doing better than you think. Let’s continue supporting one another with open hearts and shared stories.
How to Support Your Child’s Transition to Junior High School as a Foreigner Parent in Japan
So, your child is entering Japanese junior high school—and while it’s an exciting new chapter, let’s be honest: it can also feel a bit overwhelming. Not just for your child, but for you as a parent navigating this transition in a system that might still feel foreign.
If you’re wondering, “How can I truly support my child when I’m still learning how things work here myself?”—you’re not alone. I’m in that same phase too. And in this section, I want to share some of the practical, emotional, and even cultural ways we can be there for our kids as they step into this new world.
1. Understand What’s Changing—for Both of You
Junior high school in Japan brings some big shifts. Suddenly, there are:
• More subjects (often taught by different teachers)
• New classmates from other elementary schools
• Regular tests and increased academic pressure
• Longer school days, and possibly club activities
• More independence is expected from students
This can be a lot for a 12 or 13-year-old to process. And for us parents? It means adjusting how we support them—while still being their emotional anchor.
2. Make Home Their Safe and Recharging Space
With all the changes happening at school, one of the best gifts we can give our children is a sense of emotional safety at home. Here’s what I’ve learned:
• Listen more than you lecture. Even if they’re quiet, just knowing you’re there matters.
• Create a calming after-school routine. Whether it’s her favorite drink and snacks, a quick chat, or simply resting, give them space to unwind.
• Normalize their feelings. It’s okay to feel nervous, overwhelmed, or unsure—it doesn’t mean they’re failing. It means they’re growing.
Sometimes, a gentle “How was your day?” or “You did your best, and that’s enough” goes farther than we think.
3. Guide Them—but Let Them Learn and Grow
Back in the Philippines, many of us grew up in an environment where academic pressure was high. We were expected to study hard, compete, and get good grades because it was the key to a better future. I still remember those long nights of memorizing formulas and crying over test results, believing that my worth was somehow tied to numbers on a report card.
And now, as a mom raising my daughter here in Japan, I catch myself sometimes wanting to pass on that same drive. Of course, I want her to study well. I want her to succeed. But I’ve also realized—she didn’t grow up in the same world I did. And if I truly want her to thrive, I need to let her grow in a way that honors who she is, not just who I used to be.
So instead of forcing her to study endlessly just to chase high grades, I’ve chosen to guide her gently:
- I remind her to review daily, but I don’t hover.
- I help her set small goals—not to compete with others, but to grow from within.
- I celebrate her effort more than the results.
Because here’s the truth: junior high school is not just about academics. It’s about discovering identity, learning life skills, building resilience, and developing a sense of responsibility. These are lessons that go far beyond textbooks.
A child who feels supported, not pressured, will find their own reasons to grow—and those reasons will carry them farther than any grade ever could.
As a mom, my role isn’t to control her journey—it’s to walk beside her, to be her mirror when she forgets her worth, and to cheer her on whether she gets an A or a C.
So if you’re in the same place, trying to find the balance between encouraging your child and letting go—breathe. You’re not alone. You’re doing it right. Just by being present and choosing love over pressure, you’re already giving them more than enough.
4. Support Their Studies (Even If You’re Not Fluent in Japanese)
If you don’t speak Japanese fluently, you might feel unsure how to help academically. I’ve felt that way too. But there are still ways to stay involved:
• Use bilingual study aids or apps—like Google Translate’s camera feature for homework, or YouTube channels that explain junior high topics in English.
• Check if your city offers multicultural support or tutoring programs.
• Speak with teachers early on. Even if your Japanese is limited, showing up and asking for help is powerful.
Also, don’t underestimate your ability to support study habits: showing encouragement, setting a quiet study space, and celebrating small wins can boost your child’s confidence immensely.
5. Be a Bridge Between Cultures
As foreign parents, we offer something unique—a dual lens that helps our children grow with a broader worldview. When they feel torn between “fitting in” and embracing their identity, remind them that their background is a strength, not a limitation.
You can:
• Share stories from your own school experience.
• Talk about how people in your culture handle school challenges.
• Teach them to take pride in being bilingual or bicultural.
This gentle encouragement helps them build self-esteem and feel proud of who they are.
6. Stay Involved—Even If It Feels Uncomfortable
Let’s face it—school communication in Japan can be… a lot. And not always easy to understand.
But your presence matters:
• Try to attend PTA meetings or at least the ones related to your child’s class.
• Use tools like Google Lens to scan and translate school notices.
• Ask the school if there’s multilingual support or foreign parent liaisons.
Even showing up imperfectly is better than not showing up at all. You’re showing your child that you’re trying—and that speaks volumes.
This transition isn’t just your child’s journey—it’s yours too. You’re learning, adapting, and loving in a language and culture not your own, and that takes immense strength. Give yourself grace. Celebrate your wins, even the small ones. And trust that your love and presence are more than enough.
You’re doing better than you think—and your child feels it, even if they don’t always say it.
Navigating Communication
One of the most challenging parts of entering junior high school in Japan as a foreign parent isn’t just the schedule changes or new expectations—it’s the school communication. Suddenly, you’re handed forms, updates, and letters… all in Japanese. And not just easy-to-read Japanese, but formal school terms that can overwhelm even those who’ve lived here for years. I get it. I’ve been there, standing in front of a form thinking, “Am I signing up for what or volunteering for something I don’t understand?”
But here’s the good news: you don’t have to face it alone.
The Kidzuna Net
During the setsumeikai (説明会)—the school orientation usually held around January before your child enters junior high—you’ll be asked to download an app called Kidzuna Net. Please don’t overlook this! It’s not just another app—it’s the main way your child’s school communicates with you.
From announcements to class schedule changes, school closures, PTA updates, health check reminders, and bukatsu notices—it all gets posted inside this app. Gone are the days of relying solely on crumpled papers in your child’s randoseru. With Kidzuna Net, everything you need to stay informed is in one place—on your phone.
Translation Options That Truly Help
What makes this app truly invaluable for foreign parents is that it offers multilingual translation. You can change the app’s language to suit your needs. As of now, the supported languages include:
• English
• Chinese (Simplified and Traditional)
• Portuguese
• Vietnamese
• Spanish
• Korean
• Filipino
As someone who doesn’t read kanji fluently, this feature has been such a relief. Even if the original message is in Japanese, you can view the content in your preferred language. And honestly, just that small detail takes off so much stress.
How It Works and Why It Matters
Once you download the app and register with your child’s school code (provided during the setsumeikai), you’ll begin receiving real-time notifications straight to your phone. You’ll get:
• Emergency alerts (typhoon closures, sudden changes in schedule)
• Health updates (like COVID-related info, flu outbreaks, etc.)
• Event announcements (sports festivals, open school days, exam schedules)
• Homework and bukatsu reminders
• Daily school life updates
This means you’ll always know what’s happening in your child’s school life, even if your Japanese isn’t perfect.
Final Thoughts: We’re Learning and Growing Together
If you’ve made it this far, thank you. Truly. I hope you felt like you were sitting with me, just sharing stories, questions, and quiet worries over a warm cup of coffee.
As a foreign mom raising a child in Japan, especially during this big transition into junior high school, I know firsthand how overwhelming it can be. There are moments of doubt, confusion, and wondering if we’re doing enough… or doing it right.
But let me tell you this: you’re not alone. Every form we try to read, every school event we show up to with nervous smiles, every lunch we pack, and every word of encouragement we give—it matters. Even if it’s quiet. Even if no one sees it right away.
What I’ve learned so far is that we don’t need to have all the answers to be great parents. We just need to keep showing up—with love, with curiosity, and with an open heart to learn alongside our kids. Junior high school isn’t just a new chapter for our children—it’s a new chapter for us, too.
So, whether your child just stepped through those gates for the first time or you’re months into this new routine, I hope you find peace in knowing that you’re doing a beautiful job. One step at a time.
Let’s keep walking this journey together—with grace, with courage, and with the quiet strength that only a parent’s love can carry.
