From Pain to Good Vibes to Creating a Life I Will Love: Lessons in Self-Love, Healing, and Personal Growth Inspired by Good Vibes, Good Life by Vex King

In our last post, we peeled back the heavy layers of life’s raw truth—the kind of pain you can’t always fix, only accept. We talked about how radical acceptance sets you free, especially when life feels out of your control. And as someone living far away from home in Japan, raising kids in a land where I still sometimes feel like a stranger, I’ve come to know that truth in my bones.

But once you accept what is, what comes next?

What happens after you’ve made peace with your struggles… but your heart still longs for something more?

Here’s what I’ve learned: Acceptance is the beginning—but it’s not the end. The next step is to rise. And that rise begins with a choice: the choice to protect your energy, to shift your focus, to love yourself enough to choose good vibrations, even when your world isn’t perfect.

This is the message that Good Vibes, Good Life by Vex King whispered into my soul—and then shouted into my reality. It’s not just a book about thinking positively. It’s a guide for transforming your inner world so you can attract peace, purpose, and genuine happiness. Not because life suddenly becomes easy, but because you become stronger, softer, and wiser.

So in today’s post, I want to take you beyond acceptance. I want to share with you the beautiful, life-changing wisdom I found in this book—lessons that are now shaping how I live, heal, parent, and build my dreams here in Japan.

Because I’ve lived the opposite of good vibes, I’ve lived the loneliness, the silent heartbreaks, the invisible battles. I’ve stayed up at night wondering how I could keep smiling for my kids when my world felt like it was silently breaking.

But this book reminded me: I am not powerless. I am energy. I am vibration. And I get to choose what I carry into each day.

You do too.

So if you’ve been feeling stuck, low, or tired of pretending you’re okay, this post is for you.

Let’s dive deep into the powerful truth that:

When you protect your energy, you protect your life. And when you raise your vibration, you raise your entire world. 

What Is Self-Love, Really?

Table of Contents

When I first came to Japan, I thought loving myself meant getting my hair done, treating myself to a matcha latte on hard days, or buying something cute from Daiso to cheer myself up. But over time—especially after reading Good Vibes, Good Life—I’ve learned that true self-love is much deeper than self-care moments. It’s not just about treating yourself nicely—it’s about being there for yourself when no one else is. It’s about believing, deep down, that you matter.

So, what is self-love?

According to Vex King, self-love is the balance between accepting yourself as you are, while also recognizing that you deserve more—and then taking inspired action to grow into that better version of yourself.

It’s both compassion and courage.

It’s saying to yourself, “I am enough as I am,” and at the same time, “But I’m still worthy of more.”

It’s the kind of love that heals your past, strengthens your present, and protects your future.

As a Foreigner in Japan, I Struggled to See My Worth

When I became a mother here, far away from my family and the comforting warmth of my culture, I often felt invisible. Like I was just surviving. My dreams were put on hold. My voice softened to avoid conflict. My needs were ignored—not just by others, but by me.

I stayed quiet when I should’ve stood up.

I settled when I should’ve soared.

I gave everything to everyone—except myself.

And maybe, like me, you’ve learned to “accept” your situation. You’ve tried to make peace with financial struggles, emotional loneliness, or the feeling of being different in a foreign country.

But Vex King says something radical:

Self-love means refusing to accept a life that dims your light.

It means setting boundaries, not just with others, but with your own thoughts. It means no longer letting your inner critic tell you that you don’t deserve peace, love, or joy because you made mistakes or life didn’t go as planned.

 Self-Love Is an Energy Shift

Vex reminds us that everything in this universe is energy, including our thoughts, emotions, and beliefs. And when you don’t love yourself, your energy stays low. You attract relationships that mirror your lack of self-worth. You stay stuck in cycles that repeat pain, not peace.

But when you begin to truly love yourself—by honoring your emotions, speaking kindly to yourself, and believing you deserve joy—you raise your vibration.

And what happens next? Your life begins to change.

Because high vibrations attract better things. Not by magic, but by alignment.

You start choosing people who uplift you.

You start making decisions based on your worth, not your wounds.

You stop settling for a life that drains you and begin creating one that inspires you.

How Self-Love Looks in Our Real Life in Japan

For us foreigners living in Japan, self-love might look like…

  • Saying no to emotional pressure—even when it’s from someone you love.
  • Taking a walk alone and letting yourself cry under sakura trees, because you’re human, and that’s okay.
  • Pursuing your dream of starting that blog, that business, or that YouTube channel—not when everything’s perfect, but now.
  • Asking for help from a community, a mentor, or even just a friend, because you’re not meant to do life alone.
  • Speaking kindly to yourself when you stumble through Japanese, or feel like you don’t belong. You do.

Self-Love Is the Door to the Life You Deserve

I used to think self-love was selfish. But now I see—it’s survival. It’s the fuel that keeps you going when everything feels heavy. It’s the reason you’ll rise even after being broken. It’s the foundation for every dream you dare to chase.

So let me remind you, just as I remind myself every day:

You are allowed to rest.

You are allowed to dream again.

You are allowed to say, “This is not enough,” and build something better.

You are allowed to love yourself—loudly, proudly, and without apology.

Because when you love yourself fully, you don’t just heal—you glow.

And when you glow, your whole life begins to rise with you.

PART ONE: A Matter of Vibes

When I first heard the phrase “raise your vibration”, I’ll be honest—I didn’t understand it. I thought it sounded vague, like one of those Instagram quotes that looked pretty but didn’t really mean much. But as I walked through some of the hardest days of my life here in Japan—navigating motherhood without support, carrying debts that weren’t mine, speaking a language I barely understood, feeling like a stranger in my own life—I began to realize something:

Your energy speaks louder than your words.

It shapes your thoughts.

It attracts your reality.

It builds your world.

This is what Vex King means when he says that everything is vibration.

More Than Just Positive Thinking

Vex opens the book with a beautiful truth: There’s more to creating your best life than simply “thinking positive.”

That alone shook me. Because for so long, I thought I just needed to smile through the pain. To fake gratitude. To repeat affirmations that didn’t feel true yet. But that’s not real healing.

And it’s definitely not how we vibe higher.

Vibes aren’t about pretending.

They’re about aligning.

You can’t create a joyful life while carrying unhealed shame, bitterness, or self-hate in your heart. You can’t manifest light from a place of constant darkness inside.

Your vibe—your energy—isn’t just about what you say.

It’s the sum of your beliefs, your emotions, your habits, your self-talk, and your intentions.

What’s Missing From the Law of Attraction?

The Law of Attraction says, “What you think, you attract.”

But Vex King goes deeper. He says the real key isn’t just in your thoughts, but in your vibration.

Because you can think, “I want peace,”

…but if you’re carrying fear, guilt, resentment, or lack inside you, the universe responds not to your words, but to your energy.

I felt this on such a deep level.

There were nights I’d cry myself to sleep, whispering, “I just want happiness, I just want peace.”

But during the day, I’d still be trapped in low-vibe cycles—self-doubt, survival thinking, bitterness from being unappreciated or unseen.

And nothing changed.

Because my heart wasn’t aligned with the life I was asking for.

My vibration was too low to receive it.

 The Law of Vibration: You Attract What You Are

This changed everything for me:

You don’t attract what you want.

You attract what you are.

If your inner world is filled with anger, shame, fear, or unworthiness, you keep pulling in more situations, people, and patterns that reflect that back to you.

But when you begin to heal your energy with self-love, forgiveness, gratitude, healthy boundaries, aligned action, everything around you slowly starts to shift.

That’s the law of vibration at work.

Good Vibes Only? Let’s Talk Honestly

We’ve all seen the phrase “Good Vibes Only” plastered on tote bags and coffee mugs. But Vex is quick to remind us: this isn’t about toxic positivity.

It’s not about suppressing your real emotions or pretending everything’s okay when it’s not.

It’s about choosing your energy with awareness.

It’s about knowing that your feelings are valid, but not every emotion deserves a permanent home inside you.

“Feel it. Honor it. But don’t live in it.”

This resonated with me deeply.

In Japan, there were many days I felt trapped—in a failing relationship, in financial uncertainty, in cultural isolation. And yes, I had every reason to cry, to rage, to feel broken.

But I also had a choice:

Would I stay in that pain… or would I slowly begin to shift into healing?

Would I let bitterness own me… or would I rise with grace and intention?

Raising your vibration doesn’t mean escaping your feelings.

It means loving yourself enough to heal them.

How This Looks in Real Life

Here’s what applying these truths has looked like in my own journey:

  • I stopped saying yes to people who drained me, even when it made me feel guilty.
  • I started waking up earlier just to have quiet time with my thoughts, to reset, to pray.
  • I began replacing self-blame with self-compassion: “I’m doing the best I can with what I have.”
  • I said out loud what I used to be ashamed of: “I deserve better.”

And slowly, the people, opportunities, and moments that matched my new vibration… began to arrive.

It’s not magic. It’s alignment. It’s energy. It’s healing.

 Protect Your Vibe Like Your Life Depends on It—Because It Does

Your vibe isn’t some fluffy spiritual trend.

It’s the foundation of your life.

Your peace, your joy, your relationships, your dreams—they all begin with the energy you carry every day.

So protect your peace.

Surround yourself with people who uplift you.

Let go of the beliefs that tell you you’re not enough.

And keep choosing the energy that reflects the future you’re building.

Because the truth is, you are the vibe.

And when you become a loving, grounded, radiant force…

You don’t just attract a good life.

You create one.

PART TWO: Positive Lifestyle Habits

It’s one thing to say, “I want to change my life.”

But real transformation happens not just through wishful thinking—it happens in your habits, your daily choices, your small moments.

When I started taking Vex King’s wisdom seriously, I realized this:

Your habits either feed your healing… or your hurt.

And as a foreigner trying to survive in Japan, where everything can feel unfamiliar and overwhelming, building positive lifestyle habits became my anchor. When I had nothing else to control—no financial stability, no emotional support—I could still choose how I cared for myself every single day.

Let me walk you through these powerful habits—not just what they are, but how they saved me, shaped me, and continue to raise my vibration even in the hardest seasons.

1. Surround Yourself with Positive People

This one hit me hardest. Living in Japan, far from my family and friends back home, I learned quickly:

Who you allow into your inner world will either drain you or pour into you.

Vex reminds us that if you’re constantly surrounded by people who complain, gossip, or belittle your dreams, you will unconsciously vibrate at their level. And I’ve lived that.

I stayed silent around people who didn’t understand me or judged my journey. I allowed emotional manipulators into my space—because I was afraid to be alone.

But healing taught me this:

Sometimes peace looks like distance.

Sometimes your vibe rises when your circle shrinks.

So now, I choose people who speak life into me, even if it’s just one or two. I fill my mind with voices—books, mentors, podcasts—that remind me of my power. And it’s made all the difference.

2. Change Your Body Language

I used to walk with my shoulders hunched, eyes lowered, especially in public places where I felt I didn’t “fit in.” But Vex shares how body language influences not just how others see us—but how we see ourselves.

Now, even on hard days, I stand tall.

I breathe deeply. I smile with intention.

I walk like I’m proud of the woman I’m becoming.

You don’t wait until you’re confident to carry yourself with strength.

You carry yourself with strength… and your confidence follows.

3. Take Some Time Out

As a mother in Japan without much help, this felt impossible. But I realized I was burning out because I was giving everything to everyone else—and leaving nothing for me.

So I started small:

  • A hot bath with calming music after work.
  • A quiet walk to our neighborhood just to breathe.
  • Journaling, even for five minutes.

Self-love sometimes looks like pausing when the world expects you to push through.

You’re not lazy for resting. You’re preserving your light.

 4. Find Some Inspiration

When the world feels dark, inspiration is your flashlight.

There were days I had no energy to dream. But listening to Vex King’s affirmations, reading blogs from women who had risen from rock bottom, and surrounding myself with beauty (nature, art, uplifting music)—those things sparked a light in me.

Even watching the cherry blossoms bloom reminded me:

“Seasons change. You will, too.”

So find what lifts you. Make space for it. Let it pour fuel into your soul.

5. Stay Clear of Gossip and Drama

This was a habit I didn’t realize was lowering my vibration until I stepped away.

In some foreign communities in Japan, gossip feels like a way to connect. But the more I joined those conversations, the more drained I felt—more judgmental, more anxious, smaller.

Vex teaches us:

“Gossip is the devil’s radio—don’t tune in.”

If the conversation costs you your peace, walk away.

Peace is too expensive to trade for cheap talk.

6. Sort Out Your Nutrition and Water

When you’re emotionally exhausted, it’s tempting to grab whatever’s easy. I used to live on snacks and sugary treats. But I noticed how sluggish, anxious, and bloated I felt—physically and emotionally.

So I began to hydrate intentionally. I cooked simple, nourishing meals.

And I started seeing food as fuel, not a filler for emotional gaps.

Vex reminds us:

Your body is your home. How you care for it shows how much you love yourself.

So love it gently. Feed it well.

7. Express Gratitude

Gratitude shifted my entire reality.

Even when everything felt wrong—no money, no support, no clarity—I started writing 3 things I was grateful for each morning. Some days, all I could write was, “I’m breathing. My children are healthy. I have today.”

But slowly, this daily practice taught me to notice joy instead of waiting for it.

Gratitude isn’t about denying pain.

It’s about honoring the blessings that still live inside the storm.

8. Study Your Emotions

Vex says emotions are messengers, not enemies. That changed how I saw my anger, sadness, and even jeaousy.

Instead of numbing them, I started asking:

“What are you trying to teach me?”

“Where does this hurt come from?”

“What do I really need right now?”

This habit helped me stop blaming others and start understanding myself. That’s how you grow.

9. Awareness of the Present

Japan taught me this one beautifully.

When you’re constantly overwhelmed, the present moment becomes your safe space. Watching the seasons change. Hearing your child laugh. Feeling your feet touch tatami mats. Smelling the warm rice cooking.

Vex encourages us to stop overthinking the past or fearing the future. Because all we really have… is now. And now is more than enough when you’re present for it.

10. Meditate

I used to think meditation was too spiritual or complicated. But Vex simplifies it: “Meditation is connecting with your highest self.”

For me, meditation became a form of survival—a way to silence the chaos around me and tune in to the calm inside.

Some days, I sit for 10 minutes in silence. Other days, I breathe deeply with a guided meditation in the background. Either way, I finish more grounded, more aligned, more whole.

And that… is priceless.

Turn Habits Into Healing

Every habit you practice either pulls you down or lifts you higher.

You don’t have to change your entire life overnight.

But you can begin to choose better, softer, more loving ways to care for your soul today.

These aren’t just habits.

These are acts of devotion to the person you are becoming.

So protect your energy. Honor your spirit.

And build a lifestyle that supports the life you deserve—not the one you’ve settled for.

Part Three: Make Yourself a Priority

There was a time when I thought that putting myself first was selfish.

That being a good wife meant sacrificing my joy. That being a mother meant hiding my pain.

That being a foreigner in Japan meant I had to constantly prove I was worthy of staying.

But here’s the truth Vex King helped me accept:

Self-love isn’t selfish. It’s survival.

If you keep giving from an empty heart, you’ll eventually break—and call it strength.

If you keep saying yes to others and no to yourself, your soul will whisper:

“Please don’t forget me.”

This chapter reminded me to make my healing, my peace, my life a priority.

Because you matter, and you deserve to treat yourself like you do.

1. Check Your Own Behaviour

Before pointing fingers outward, Vex challenges us to look inward.

Are we showing up with integrity?

Are we treating ourselves the way we expect others to treat us?

For me, this meant facing uncomfortable truths:

  • I let people walk over me because I was afraid of rejection.
  • I stayed silent because I feared conflict.
  • I kept overgiving, hoping someone would finally say, “You’re enough.”

But healing starts with radical honesty.

Now I ask myself: “Am I honouring myself in this moment?”

If not, I change the behavior, not just the blame.

You can’t change others. But you can choose who you become in response.

2. The Power of a Good Partner

This one hit hard. Vex talks about how the right partner adds peace, not pressure.

But what if your reality is different?

As for me, I married thinking love would save us.

But I soon realized I was walking alone, even in marriage.

A good partner doesn’t make you doubt your worth.

They won’t use your love as leverage. They’ll protect your spirit, not just your image.

And if that’s not your story right now, know this:

You are allowed to choose you. Even in heartbreak. Even in disappointment.

One day, the right love will feel like home, not a battlefield.

3. Choose Real Friendships

Living abroad taught me that not every smile is sincere.

I’ve had friendships built on convenience, not connection.

Conversations that felt draining instead of healing.

Vex reminds us:

“Genuine friendships are rare. But they are worth the wait.”

A real friend will:

  • Celebrate your wins without envy.
  • Sit with you in silence during your storms.
  • Call you out with love, not shame.

Don’t chase circles that make you shrink.

Build your tribe with people who water your growth—even when it’s slow.

4. Facing Family

Family can be the hardest place to practice self-love.

Vex writes, “Just because someone is family doesn’t mean they’re good for your soul.”

That truth cracked something inside me.

Growing up, I thought unconditional love meant tolerating everything—even pain.

But I’ve learned that:

You can love someone and still protect yourself from their patterns.

You can forgive them and still choose distance.

In Japan, I’ve had to emotionally untangle myself from expectations back home.

And it wasn’t easy. But it was necessary.

5. Being There for Others

Helping others is beautiful—but not when it costs you your own healing.

There were times I poured into everyone else and left nothing for myself.

I thought that was love. But it was self-abandonment.

Vex’s lesson here is powerful:

Be there for others. But don’t lose yourself while doing it.

Now, I give from overflow, not obligation.

Because when I’m full, my love is pure. Not resentful.

6. Handling Negative People

Some people will never see your light. Some only show up to dim it.

Especially when you’re growing, changing, and rising.

I’ve encountered this many times, in family ties, even online.

But I’ve learned to stop explaining myself to those committed to misunderstanding me.

Vex teaches:

“You don’t owe your energy to anyone who disrupts your peace.”

Protect your vibe like it’s your soul’s currency.

Not everyone deserves access to your sacred space.

7. Trying to Please 

Oh, how I lived in this trap.

As a woman in Japan, as a wife, as a mom, as a foreigner—

I kept shapeshifting to be accepted.

I bent over backward to make everyone comfortable—except me.

But Vex reminds us:

“When you try to please everyone, you lose yourself in the process.”

Now, I’d rather disappoint someone else than abandon myself again.

Choose peace over perfection.

Choose truth over approval.

Choose you.

8. Let Your Good Vibes Protect You

Your energy is sacred.

And as Vex says, you can set energetic boundaries before even saying a word.

You know that feeling when someone walks into the room and everything shifts?

That’s the power of your vibration.

So protect your joy. Safeguard your peace.

Let your calmness speak louder than your defense.

Because when your energy is grounded, even chaos loses its grip.

9. Dare to Leave a Toxic Job

I’ll never forget that time when I felt invisible. Undervalued. Emotionally exhausted.

But I stayed because I needed money, I needed to make a living.

That’s the reality for many foreigners in Japan.

But one day, I reached my breaking point.

And I asked myself: “Is this work costing me my soul?”

Vex shares:

“You weren’t born to be miserable for a paycheck.”

I began planting seeds elsewhere—blogging, writing, creating, following what lights up my soul. 

It wasn’t instant. But it was intentional.

And one day, it bloomed into the freedom I only used to dream about.

You Are Allowed to Choose Yourself

This part of the book cracked me open.

It reminded me that self-love isn’t just bubble baths and affirmations.

It’s walking away from what wounds you.

It’s making yourself a priority—even when it’s uncomfortable.

It’s saying: “I matter, too.”

So to every woman reading this, especially those far from home, rebuilding a life, dreaming through the storm—

Don’t just survive.

Rise. Reclaim. And return home to yourself.

Part Four: Accepting Yourself

I used to wake up and instantly feel like I wasn’t enough.

Not pretty enough. Not strong enough. Not smart, not accomplished, not Japanese enough.

I’d scroll through pictures of other moms, other wives, other women who seemed to have it all together.

I’d look in the mirror and wonder, “Why can’t I be more like them?”

But the deeper I sank into comparison, the more I forgot this truth:

I wasn’t born to blend in. I was born to become fully, unapologetically, lovingly… me.

This chapter of Vex King’s book whispered something I didn’t even know I was longing to hear:

“You don’t need fixing. You need to remember.”

Remembering your worth.

Your beauty.

Your voice.

Your enough-ness.

So if you’ve ever felt lost in who you’re not, this is your invitation to come home to who you are.

1. Appreciate Your Physical Beauty

There were days I’d avoid mirrors completely.

Living in Japan, where beauty ideals are often rigid and skin-deep, made me feel like I didn’t belong in my own body.

But Vex reminded me:

“Your body is your home. Don’t let society convince you to hate it.”

Now I’ve learned to thank my body, not judge it.

Thank you, eyes, for seeing the wonder in my children.

Thank you, arms, for carrying groceries, dreams, and babies at once.

Thank you, stretch marks, for being love’s signature.

Your body is not a problem to fix.

It’s a miracle to love—exactly as it is.

2. Compare Only with Yourself

Comparison was my daily poison.

I compared my blog to others’ success.

My home to Pinterest.

My healing to someone else’s timeline.

But as Vex teaches:

“The only person you should compete with is the person you were yesterday.”

Now, I celebrate progress, not perfection.

I ask:

  • Am I growing?
  • Am I showing up?
  • Am I trying again, even after falling?

If yes—that’s victory.

You don’t need to run someone else’s race.

Your path is sacred.

Your pace is divine.

 3. Value Your Inner Beauty

In a world obsessed with filters and facades, it’s easy to forget that real beauty is invisible to the eye.

It’s in how you comfort someone with your presence.

How you speak kindness behind closed doors.

How do you forgive those who never apologized?

As a mother, I’ve realized:

My children won’t remember how I looked.

They’ll remember how I made them feel.

And so, I water my heart more than my hair.

Because the glow that matters most… comes from the soul.

4. Celebrate Your Achievements

Sometimes we think only big wins count—like publishing a book, hitting six figures, or going viral.

But what about the quiet victories?

Like getting out of bed on a heavy day.

Or choosing peace over arguing.

Or writing a blog post, even when no one has clapped yet.

Vex reminded me:

“If you don’t celebrate your small wins, your mind won’t feel safe to dream bigger.”

So I keep a “Victory Journal.”

Every baby step I take—I honor it.

Because small steps create big breakthroughs.

And every win, no matter how small, is proof that I am becoming.

5. Respect Your Uniqueness

I used to silence parts of myself to fit in.

Especially here in Japan, where being different often feels like being too much.

Too loud. Too emotional. Too foreign. Too bold.

But the moment I started embracing my quirks, my culture, my voice—

was the moment I finally felt free.

Vex beautifully shares:

“What makes you different makes you powerful.”

You weren’t born to copy.

You were born to create.

Your story, your voice, your magic—someone out there needs it.

So shine in your own shade.

The world already has enough copies.

It’s craving you.

6. Be Kind and Forgive Yourself

This one… took me years.

I carried guilt like it was a part of my identity.

I punished myself for not leaving earlier. For not speaking up. For not knowing better.

But Vex gently reminds us:

“You’re doing the best you can with the awareness and tools you have. Forgive yourself.”

And I’ve learned to speak to myself the way I speak to my daughters:

“You’re doing amazing. I’m proud of you. I love you—even when you’re struggling.”

Forgiveness isn’t forgetting.

It’s releasing the weight of shame, so we can rise again—with softness, not scars.

 Coming Home to You

This chapter is not just about acceptance—it’s about returning.

Returning to the truth that you are already worthy.

That healing is not about becoming someone else, but about remembering who you were before the world told you to doubt yourself.

So let this post be your permission slip:

  • To love your reflection.
  • To celebrate your wins.
  • To honor your journey.
  • To forgive your past.
  • And to be unapologetically you.

Because self-love isn’t a destination—it’s a daily devotion.

And every time you choose yourself, you rewrite your future.

You are enough.

You are becoming.

You are already a masterpiece.

Part Five: Manifesting Goals — Mind Work

I never thought I could create the life I wanted.

I believed life just “happened” to you.

That someone like me—just a small-town girl who moved to Japan, married too young, struggled too long, and had her dreams buried by debt and disappointment—wasn’t meant for greatness.

But something shifted when I realized:

“Your outer world mirrors your inner world.”

The life I wanted?

It wasn’t waiting out there somewhere.

It was waiting inside me—all along.

And that’s the powerful message Vex King unveils in this chapter:

Your mind is not just a place of thoughts—it’s the birthplace of your reality.

Let’s break it down and make it real, raw, and life-changing.

Mind Work Is Heart Work

Manifesting isn’t just about “wishing” for things to happen.

It’s about rewiring your thoughts, healing your inner beliefs, and becoming an energetic match for the life you desire.

Here in Japan, I’ve faced countless days of isolation, cultural barriers, and self-doubt.

But I’ve also learned that no matter where you live, your power to create your future starts inside your mind.

The work begins within.

Because before life changes, your mindset must transform.

1. The Importance of Positive Thinking

Vex reminds us that what we constantly think becomes what we consistently experience.

And it’s true—when I focused on what was going wrong, I only attracted more stress and sadness.

But when I began training my thoughts to focus on what was going right, even the little things, life shifted.

“Your thoughts send signals into the universe—and the universe responds in kind.”

This isn’t about ignoring problems.

It’s about choosing the lens through which you see them.

Try this:

“Even when things are uncertain, I choose to believe something good is coming.”

2. Your Mentality Is Your Reality

“The way you think about life becomes the way you experience it.”

Living in a foreign country can make you feel powerless, but your mindset restores your power.

Do you think of yourself as a victim of life or a creator of life?

Vex challenges us to shift from, “Why is this happening to me?”

to…

👉 “What is this trying to teach me?”

Your reality is not just what you see.

It’s what you believe about what you see.

3. Understanding the Subconscious Mind

Here’s where it gets deep: 95% of what we do is controlled by the subconscious mind.

This means your deeply rooted beliefs—often shaped by childhood, trauma, or culture—are the ones running your life.

I grew up thinking I had to earn love, chase approval, and stay small.

But those were programs, not truths.

And guess what?

You can rewrite those programs.

Through daily awareness, gentle healing, and repetition, you can teach your subconscious a new way of being.

One filled with joy, worthiness, and peace.

4. Going Beyond Thoughts

It’s not enough to think positively—we have to feel it.

Because your vibe—your emotional frequency—is what communicates with the universe.

This is where journaling, meditating, and visualizing come in.

For me, I’d sit in my room, close my eyes, and feel as if I was already living the life I prayed for:

Freedom. Peace. Purpose. Security.

I’d imagine my daughters thriving. My blog is growing. My heart is healing.

That feeling? That’s alignment.

And alignment attracts.

5. One Thought Is All It Takes

One single thought—

“I am worthy.”

“I can do this.”

“This too shall pass.”

—can change your entire trajectory.

Vex says every major change begins with a new thought.

And I’ve found that true in my own healing.

One thought led me to start my blog.

One thought made me say no more to emotional abuse.

One thought reminded me I’m still becoming.

So choose your next thought wisely.

It might just be the one that rewrites your life.

6. Changing Your Beliefs

Beliefs aren’t facts—they’re just repeated thoughts.

If you keep telling yourself you’re stuck, not good enough, or doomed to fail, you’ll start living like it’s true.

But when you challenge your beliefs, you change your reality.

Try asking yourself:

  • Where did this belief come from?
  • Is it helping or hurting me?
  • What would I believe if I truly loved myself?

You get to choose what stays in your mind.

And what gets rewritten with love.

7. Repeating Affirmations

I used to think affirmations were silly… until I realized how powerful they are in reprogramming your subconscious.

I started with simple ones:

  • “I am healing.”
  • “My life is unfolding perfectly for me.”
  • “I am safe.”
  • “I am divinely guided, protected, and provided always.”

I wrote them on sticky notes.

I whispered them while washing dishes.

I declared them before sleep.

And over time, my brain believed them.

Because the mind listens.

Especially when you speak with love.

8. The Power of Words

Words are spells.

They create energy.

The things you say to yourself—whether out loud or in silence—are building your future brick by brick.

So please be gentle.

Replace “I can’t” with “I’m learning.”

Replace “I’m broken” with “I’m growing.”

Speak life over yourself.

Because your words become the soil your future grows in.

9. Set the Intention

Intentions are like guiding stars.

They don’t force outcomes—they focus your energy.

Before every blog post I write, I set this intention:

“May this bless someone who needs hope.”

You don’t have to know how.

You just need to set the what.

And trust life will meet you halfway.

10. Write Down Your Goals

There’s something magical about pen meeting paper.

When I started writing my goals—no matter how small or impossible they seemed—something inside me awakened.

Writing is declaring.

It’s affirming to yourself and to the universe: I believe this is possible.

And when you believe, you begin to act differently.

You make choices that align.

You become a magnet for the life you’re building.

11. Imagine It to Live It

Visualization is a sacred practice.

I see my daughters laughing in a warm, cozy home.

I see my blog reaching thousands of hearts.

I see myself financially free, supporting women to rise.

I don’t just hope for these things—I feel them.

And that feeling? That’s creation.

The more you imagine it, the more you make space for it.

12. The Universe Is Supporting You

This is the deepest truth Vex reminds us of:

“The universe has your back.”

Even when life feels unfair.

Even when it’s hard.

Even when your prayers go unanswered…

You are still being guided.

Still being prepared.

Still being loved.

And sometimes the detours are the divine path.

I’ve lived it.

I’m still living it.

And I’m still manifesting.

So don’t give up.

You’re Allowed to Dream Again

You don’t need to have it all figured out.

You just need to believe it’s possible.

Manifesting isn’t magic—it’s mindset.

It’s aligning your heart, your thoughts, your energy, and your actions toward a life that lights you up.

You’re allowed to ask for more.

You’re allowed to dream bigger.

You’re allowed to heal, rise, and become everything you were meant to be.

The universe is listening.

Now speak your truth.

Because the life of your dreams…

is waiting for you to believe in it.

 Part Six: Manifesting Goals — Taking Action

I used to sit in my room staring at my audacious dreams, thinking, Are these really possible? 

“Will my life ever change?”

I had the dreams. I whispered the affirmations. I prayed late into the night.

But nothing really shifted… until one day I realized:

🌱 Change doesn’t come just because you want it. Change comes because you take action.

That’s what Vex King teaches in this chapter—and it was the wake-up call I didn’t know I needed.

Manifestation isn’t about waiting.

It’s about walking—even if it’s trembling, slow, unsure steps.

And that’s what this chapter is all about.

Change Requires Action

Dreams need more than vision boards and feel-good vibes.

They need movement.

They need your energy in motion.

They need your hands, your words, your sweat.

Back when I started my blog, I didn’t know a thing about writing for strangers.

But I knew this: I couldn’t stay in the same place anymore.

Your dreams are not daydreams.

They are divine assignments.

And action is the prayer they respond to.

1. The Easy Route

Let’s be honest—we all crave comfort.

But as Vex says, if we always choose what’s easy now, we often end up living a hard life later.

It was easier for me to stay in a marriage that emotionally drained me.

It was easier to say, “Maybe next year I’ll start my business.”

It was easier to scroll than to show up.

But here’s the truth I had to learn the hard way:

💥 The easy route will never lead you to extraordinary destinations.

Growth demands discomfort.

And the path that stretches you—that’s the one that transforms you.

2. Consistency Leads to Results

We all want big results fast.

But the secret? It’s not speed. It’s consistency.

Showing up daily.

Even when no one’s watching.

Even when you feel like a fraud.

Even when it seems like it’s not working.

My blog hasn’t grown big yet.

But post by post, word by word—I kept building.

And one day, a message came:

“Your story gave me hope.”

That’s when I knew—consistency will take you where motivation can’t.

 3. Ordinary or Extraordinary?

Vex reminds us that ordinary choices lead to ordinary lives.

But when you dare to make bold decisions—despite the fear—you start creating an extraordinary life.

Living in Japan as a foreigner, it’s easy to feel like you should just “blend in,” stay quiet, not rock the boat.

But I chose to write, speak, and share.

Not because I wasn’t scared—but because I didn’t want to live a silent life anymore.

🌸 You don’t need to be perfect—you just need to be courageous.

4. Procrastination Will Delay Your Dreams

Procrastination feels safe.

But what it really does is steal your life one day at a time.

I told myself:

“I’ll start writing when I’m ready.”

“I’ll speak up when the timing’s right.”

“I’ll change when things calm down.”

“I’ll fix my situation when my children get a little older.”

But months passed. Years passed. And nothing changed.

Until one day, a still small voice whispered,

“If not now, when?”

Waiting for the “perfect moment” is just fear wearing a disguise.

Start messy. Start scared. Just start.

5. The Quick-Fix Society

We live in a world obsessed with shortcuts.

Lose 10kg in 5 days.

Get rich in 30 days.

Heal your trauma in a weekend.

But the truth?

True transformation takes time, patience, and soul work.

There’s no shortcut to self-love.

No fast track to lasting success.

No magic pill for peace.

But slow growth is real growth.

And it’s the kind that doesn’t fade.

6. Swap Short-Term Pleasures for Long-Term Gains

It’s tempting to choose what feels good now.

Another episode. Another nap. Another excuse.

But those small choices… they add up.

I learned to ask myself:

  • “Will this serve my future self?”
  • “Will I thank myself later?”

Trading one hour of Netflix for one hour of writing may not feel exciting now—

but it’s how you build the future you keep dreaming about.

Discipline is self-love in action.

7. Faith vs. Fear

Vex reminds us that fear and faith ask the same thing:

To believe in something you can’t see.

Fear says, “What if it all goes wrong?”

Faith says, “What if it all goes right?”

When I left my old life behind—without savings, without guarantees—I was terrified.

But my faith whispered,

“You don’t have to see the whole path. Just take the next step.”

Fear will paralyze you.

But faith will propel you.

Choose wisely.

8. Flow with the Universe

This is my favorite part.

Because action is not just about pushing and grinding.

Sometimes it’s about flowing. Trusting. Letting go.

I used to chase every goal like it was a race.

But the more I let go of control and tuned into divine timing—the more things unfolded naturally.

The blog. The healing. The peace.

Vex calls it alignment—when your energy, intention, and action move as one.

When you flow with the Universe, miracles don’t feel like accidents. They feel like your birthright.

Take the Step

Dear reader,

You already have the vision.

You’ve done the inner work.

Now, it’s time to take the step.

It might not be easy.

You might have fears.

But know deep down—you’re meant for more.

Your actions today are planting seeds for the life you haven’t lived yet.

Water them with faith.

Nurture them with courage.

And trust—they will bloom.

Self-Love Is The Key To Your Greatness

If I could go back in time and whisper something into the ears of my exhausted, heartbroken self—the one with tears falling while driving  home from work —I would tell her this:

“One day, you will understand that the love you were searching for… was always meant to come from you.”

For so long, I thought I needed someone else to make me feel whole.

That if my husband changed, or if my life looked different, then maybe I’d finally feel worthy, seen, happy.

But it wasn’t until I began choosing myself, moment by moment, that things started to shift.

That’s what self-love is.

It’s not just bubble baths or quiet mornings (though those matter too).

It’s waking up and deciding—I am worth the life I long for.

 Self-love is the Foundation of a Great Life

In Good Vibes, Good Life, Vex King teaches us that greatness doesn’t come from status, wealth, or a perfect life.

It comes from within.

From loving yourself so deeply that you stop settling for less.

From healing the parts of you that others broke.

From honoring your voice, your boundaries, your dreams—even when no one else claps for you.

Here in Japan, far from the safety of my home country, I had to learn this the hard way.

I had to rebuild myself, piece by piece, not with perfection—but with love.

There were no shortcuts. No miracles. Just a quiet decision, every day:

“I will be kind to myself today. I will fight for myself. I will believe in my worth.”

And when I started to love myself, everything else began to change.

Gratitude Turned My Pain Into Power

There were days when all I could be grateful for was the roof over our heads or the tiny giggles of my daughters as we played in our home.

But gratitude saved me.

It opened my eyes to what was still good.

It reminded me that I wasn’t losing—it was just a new beginning.

When you love yourself, you become grateful for your journey—even the hard parts.

Because every scar is proof that you survived.

Every tear is a seed of your becoming.

Self-Love Is How You Unlock Your Greatness

Greatness isn’t loud.

It’s not something you chase.

It’s something you unlock—by going within and remembering who you truly are.

You are not too broken.

You are not too late.

You are not too far gone.

You are becoming.

And self-love is the key that will open every locked door inside your soul.

As a woman, a mother, and a dreamer in a foreign land, I now believe with all my heart—

Good vibes don’t just bring a good life. They bring a deeply meaningful one.

Keep believing.

Keep healing.

Keep glowing.

Because the best is not behind you.

It’s unfolding—with every brave, beautiful step you take.

And I’ll be right here, walking beside you

A Final Blessing, From Me to You

To every woman who has lost herself in motherhood,

To every foreigner trying to build a home in a place that sometimes feels unfamiliar,

To every dreamer who feels like they’re always starting from scratch—

I see you. I am you.

And I want you to know:

You are allowed to start again.

You are allowed to love yourself fiercely.

You are allowed to outgrow the life that made you feel small.

And yes, you are allowed to unlock your own greatness.

This book wasn’t just a good read.

It was a mirror.

It reminded me—and now I hope it reminds you—that everything you need is already inside you.

You are the key.

You are the door.

And self-love… that’s how you walk through into the life you were always meant to live.

So start today.

Choose you.

Love you.

Rise.

With all my heart,

From one soul to another,

ありがとう (Arigatou), for walking this journey with me. 

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